THE PROBLEM OF PAIN ~ THE PATH OF NIRVANA ~~~
KONA, Hawaii ~ Celebrating a “nothing bad happened” day, sensing the underlying goodness of life, hoping distance from our previous pains and losses will blossom into Nirvana, the great bliss state, but we’re still whirling like dervishes with all the news.
First, the good news. The universe today is pumping and twirling with sparks of intelligent fire, magic stories on the wind, and electromagnetic fields that inspire inventions, friendliness, dance, music and conscious thought. Besides the good news of apples, tide pools and hugs, we have our amazing ability to give and receive love.
The sad news is that a dear friend lost her daughter. Close friends lost their son. Another friend lost her husband. A sweet uncle left this world, and thousands more died on Monday and Tuesday. All since Koakane’s mother Stella died in May. Last Sunday, the 10th anniversary of 9/11, the earth slid into a painful pause. Tibet, tar sands, Afghanistan, extinction of songbird habitat. Astrologers and futurists call attention to the times we are living in, the fruition of a 26,000-year-old cycle of humanity imbedded in a 14 billion- year episode of cosmic expansion from the center of our galaxy.
Mayan time cycles, a bad tooth, lost children, world hunger, war — lay any reason behind suffering on the table and find this equation: suffering = pain + resistance. While there’s much to do as conscious citizens to resist crime and prevent poor decision-making, even sitting in a room, a park, a bar or a temple, we can raise our vibration and brighten the world’s destiny. Acknowledging the open secret, the underlying quest.
Death and loss shout in loud whispers to put strawberry jam on the burnt toast of life. Love it. Eat it all up. Be like the aromas of morning, the burnished light on a window sill, the gurgle of a stream. Sensing the stillness. Silence, presence, “immortal repose,” as Willa Cather said.
Give pleasure as life gives us pleasure, with each breath, reminding us: breath gives life. Each inhale inspires us, enters, relaxes our eyes, throat heart belly tailbone feet and hands. Every time we remember to remember, letting go of habitual tension and heaviness in the body and mind, and on the exhale, swoosh it out through the bottom of the feet, letting it flow down into the iron crystal core at the center of the earth, where forces bigger than us can handle it.
What we think we lost may hang heavy, like a phantom limb, but with each breath, we revisit the inner sensation, revise our perception, re-vision, re-mold our ideas about pain and pleasure. Because now, life has our total attention. We can thank death and loss, for now we can cherish this beautiful day without too many notions. The sensuality of life, the nowness of it becomes more ravishing, more elegant, not in spite of loss, but because of its impermanence. Despite the raw way that things and people we love are torn away, our intimacy with love itself carries on.
The heart calls. The Higher Self whispers, “Forgive yourself. You did your best. Be grateful. Count blessings like Native Americans counted coup. Unwind and forgive. Let the rigid outer armor fall away, then peer behind the veil, into the unseen world. Find the truth that sets us free, the truth about how to live fully and face the one certainty we know. We will die. People we love will die. It’s painful. Yet where there is a wound, grace enters. Pain, like its gentler handmaiden, pleasure, is a pathway to wisdom and bliss. Nirvana.
Nirvana literally means “quenching” or “blowing out,” as the flame of a candle is blown out. But what is it that is “blown out”? Not the events. The change still happens, but we don’t need to declare it a loss. Our perception of what’s important, what to pay attention to, can shift as we remember: happiness, Nirvana, peace – this is our natural state.
If death, loss of a job or home, natural disaster, or other unnatural acts intervene upon our natural Nirvana, we are being called to mature a little more on the path of remembering. We remember how the triple fires of greed, hatred, and delusion cause the worst pains. We remember that forgiveness of self leads to generosity, love and wisdom. We remember that we are basically good people, doing what we can to align with the great work of reinvigorating a balanced world.
Nirvana takes two forms: the first occurs during life – often after a period of sharp pain, loss and grief — and the second nirvana occurs at death, when all suffering ceases because all craving is removed. What is blown away is the ego, the self-important nattering about how this shouldn’t have happened, the complaints over loss of innocence, the hating oneself because there is sadness.
Sadness is beautiful. Even anger can be a righteous emotion when it warns of real danger. But in nirvana, all these circuits of emotional life are illuminated by the Immortal Soul. The Soul continues to spread in waves of bliss in dimensions we can feel now, and now, and now, in our bodies, permeating our mind with cascades of clear light. If we allow Nirvana to interrupt our attachment to the past, to pain, to the thoughts, intermittently at first, we complete the painful feelings, rather than deny them. We will have fun again. We will feel whole again. Refreshing new experiences will surprise us like a perfect pizza at midnight, delivered from the black hole at the center of the galaxy, spiraling in to feed the hungry heart.
Nirvana comes when the ego, the false, self-important part of us, lets go. What was “my pain” can become “the pain.” The collective pain, humanity’s story. The clinging and projection on the pain as being the main point of life, my identity, ceases when it’s ready. Feel every moment of pain through total surrender to it; welcome every joy. Complete each feeling, release it, and let energy of each lead to something new, real and sturdy. This is the staff of life, the real nutrient. We can’t grab it. It comes to us when we are still, open, listening. The Higher Spirit and the Soul are not blown away in Nirvana. Our sense of identity does not disappear. The clenching disappears and what takes its place is freedom, “radically transformed state of consciousness which is free of the obsession with ‘me and mine’,” says the Samyutta Nikaya, The Book of the Kindred Sayings.
Nirvana, the Okayness of life – and loss — lifts up like a fountain inside us when we ask, but what really dies? The flesh that was hurting, the emotions that were draining, the confusion of our previous life. This new life, invigorated by the certainty of physical death, spawns a sense of this precious life, when we have the Immortal Soul option of knowing why we’re living and how to effectively embody the Higher Spirit through these transitional times.
What is being born? Greater sensitivity, courage and understanding of our own and others’ consciousness. Observant kindness. Precision. The ability to exchange self for other, walk a mile in another squaw’s moccasins. Resist harming, cultivate harmony.
We pay a great price for such wisdom, but if we allow it, the problem of pain always turns into Nirvana. If we don’t allow it, if we resist the seasons and movements of nature, then pain + resistance = suffering. Honest grieving minus resistance allows “the pain” to open up and transform us into the heartful gods and careful, happy goddesses we really are.
The really good news is that we may “lose” our sons and daughters but we cannot lose our LOVE for them, or theirs for us. We can lift up our gaze and look beyond the contemporary, time-bound, narrow view of things, see the cycles of history and beyond history.
Many of our current woes, if we gaze closely, turn out to be a recycling of the seven deadly sins which have plagued every Dominator Culture since the Roman Empire. That time is over, finished, done. We are at the dawn of a New Time, a new Partnership Culture. Each of us partnering with our Higher Selves, with all who agree to share more love than fear, more generosity than greed, more forgiveness than pain, and to take the longest leap of love humanity has ever taken.
Loss and pain may try to interrupt Nirvana, but Nirvana is the main dish in life’s evolutionary and eclectic meal. Gardenia, the colors fantasia and freesia, the tone of thank you, the eternal returns, savoring and renewing the sacred feast of friendships, the voices rising through all the earth and whispering into our third ear, the ancient heart.
Look for Nirvana. It’s looking for you!
Marya ~ September 16, 2011
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